(Los Angeles, California)
Devastated by the tragic loss of Lisa "left eye" Lopez two years ago this April, pop sensation TLC tried to push on as a duo with the release of 3D last summer. Following a disappointing run on the pop charts, the remaining members Tionne "T-Boz" Watkins and Rozonda "Chilli" Thomas decided to either call it quits or go in a new direction. "We were just lacking the spice that made us TLC," said T-Boz. In an effort to keep close to their original roots, the group tagged Left Eyes younger half brother Larry "Left nut" Lopez as its newest member. "Our producers thought we needed to broaden our demographic," stated Chill. "So we thought hey, what about larry? He transcends the race, weight and sex barriers." Larry who is a mix of Puerto Rican, African American and Irish grew up in the shadow of his famous sibling. He started singing rap music at the age of 5 and was inspired by Vanilla Ice, however he lacked the musical talent of his idol. At the age of 15 Larry was singing in a talent show when someone threw a beer bottle on the stage. The glass shattered at Larry's feet and sent a shard into his groin severing his right testicle, hence his nickname "left nut". On the roof of Arista studios a press conference was held Saturday. TLC's newest member had the following proclamation. "Yo! Larry 'left nut' Lopez is in the hizz-ouse. I am smooth like ex-lax and XXXL Phat. I got moves that would make Michael Flatley crap his panties. Riverdance is my beeyatch!"